![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
New story blog!
http://cyanidesweet.blogspot.com
check it out, and comment. (:
http://cyanidesweet.blogspot.com
check it out, and comment. (:
Leave a comment
just another goodbye.
infinite hearts and cups of coffee
02 June 2009 @ 06:04 pm
I'm enjoying the holidays.
Two days of almost non-stop video games, (almost finished Kingdom Hearts Re: CoM Reverse/Rebirth) lusting over The Path by Tale of Tales, talking until three am with Rifdi.
Yeah, life is good.
Tomorrow's his birthday, and we're going out. Terminator: Salvation! :D Also, Shafiq's back from Johor for a short spiel and I'm looking forward to seeing how much more Johor-ian he's gotten. Apparently he's started bragging about his 'mad DoTA skills'. Pfft.
Better yet, Cherating next week. Three days of surf, sand and sun! Oh yeah.
This is gonna be great.
Two days of almost non-stop video games, (almost finished Kingdom Hearts Re: CoM Reverse/Rebirth) lusting over The Path by Tale of Tales, talking until three am with Rifdi.
Yeah, life is good.
Tomorrow's his birthday, and we're going out. Terminator: Salvation! :D Also, Shafiq's back from Johor for a short spiel and I'm looking forward to seeing how much more Johor-ian he's gotten. Apparently he's started bragging about his 'mad DoTA skills'. Pfft.
Better yet, Cherating next week. Three days of surf, sand and sun! Oh yeah.
This is gonna be great.
Current Mood: 
cheerful
cheerfulCurrent Music: Hey Stephen - Taylor Swift
28 May 2009 @ 07:50 pm
28 May 2009 @ 07:42 pm
Janganlah kau tinggalkan diriku
Takkan mampu menghadapi semua
Hanya bersamamu ku akan bisa...
1. went to McDonalds today. I feel fat. All the french fries went straight to my thighs.
2. went to Rifdi's apartment today. Had to meet my future mother-in-law. Correction, had to carry a conversation with my future mother-in-law for fifteen minutes. Awkwardness ensues.
3. I am emo though.
Sigh.
Takkan mampu menghadapi semua
Hanya bersamamu ku akan bisa...
1. went to McDonalds today. I feel fat. All the french fries went straight to my thighs.
2. went to Rifdi's apartment today. Had to meet my future mother-in-law. Correction, had to carry a conversation with my future mother-in-law for fifteen minutes. Awkwardness ensues.
3. I am emo though.
Sigh.
Current Mood: 
cynical
cynicalCurrent Music: some korean song that emanates from karyn's computer.
27 May 2009 @ 03:11 pm
I'm starting to feel like I've been ditched. D:
This sucks.
This. Really. Sucks.
Current Mood: annoyed
annoyedCurrent Music: Lagi Dan Lagi - Andra & The Backbone
27 May 2009 @ 02:56 pm
Not really. I'm just sitting in the middle of a bunch of DoTA players.
Listening to Lee Hyori, apparently. I need better music, yeah?
So bored.
Current Mood: bemused
bemusedCurrent Music: You Go Girl - Lee Hyori
21 May 2009 @ 02:52 pm
Okay. English, BM, History, Science, and finally Pend. Islam - all done. I just have to get through the next four days (minus the weekends) and I'll be home free. :D
Cherating, here I come.
Current Mood: 
crazy
crazyCurrent Music: Hands on Me - Vanessa Carlton
10 May 2009 @ 12:15 pm
again, I'm posting from the computer at Perfection. I've been sitting here for about an hour, and I'm waiting for my class to start - 1.45.
really, there isn't anything to write. mid-terms start next week and my first paper is history, paper 1. and what am I doing? reading akuroku/zemyx fanfiction on ff.net. can't really say much, but yeah.
i'm still bored.
really, there isn't anything to write. mid-terms start next week and my first paper is history, paper 1. and what am I doing? reading akuroku/zemyx fanfiction on ff.net. can't really say much, but yeah.
i'm still bored.
Current Mood: 
hungry
hungry04 May 2009 @ 02:52 pm
I don't know about you, but this is weird.
If the control freak thing wasn't bad enough, whenever I try to tell you how I'm feeling, my words stick in my throat and I don't know how to say them anymore. How do I tell you? I can't even write them out.
I end up crossing out the words. Sheets upon sheets of paper, covered in black strike marks.
What to do, right?
If the control freak thing wasn't bad enough, whenever I try to tell you how I'm feeling, my words stick in my throat and I don't know how to say them anymore. How do I tell you? I can't even write them out.
I end up crossing out the words. Sheets upon sheets of paper, covered in black strike marks.
What to do, right?
Current Mood: 
calm
calmCurrent Music: Angel In The Night - Basshunter
30 April 2009 @ 03:35 pm
Waiting, waiting...
Tuition is supposed to start in ten minutes or so. Karyn and I are the only ones here atm. Hope we're not the only two in class though.
I don't know why I'm feeling lost.
I've discovered the art of diffusing stupid fights, so I guess that's an accomplishment. It is, right? Knowing the right words to say, knowing when you're wrong. Knowing how to fight, knowing the appropriate measures to take. Manipulative, maybe. But it works.
9 months, huh? Tomorrow, we're 9 months.
9 months. That's ridiculously long. I'm counting all the times we've broken up, all the times we've hurt each other and threatened to leave. I really, really don't believe it.
5201314.
Tuition is supposed to start in ten minutes or so. Karyn and I are the only ones here atm. Hope we're not the only two in class though.
I don't know why I'm feeling lost.
I've discovered the art of diffusing stupid fights, so I guess that's an accomplishment. It is, right? Knowing the right words to say, knowing when you're wrong. Knowing how to fight, knowing the appropriate measures to take. Manipulative, maybe. But it works.
9 months, huh? Tomorrow, we're 9 months.
9 months. That's ridiculously long. I'm counting all the times we've broken up, all the times we've hurt each other and threatened to leave. I really, really don't believe it.
5201314.
blank16 April 2009 @ 02:37 pm
Why do I always do this? Why does this always happen? God dammit, I can keep asking why but heck - it's not gonna happen. The answers aren't going to magically fall out of the sky.
Why do I always pick fights when I'm missing you?
Why do I always pick fights when I'm missing you?
Current Music: Your Call - Secondhand Serenade
09 April 2009 @ 02:55 pm
Hello livejournal, I'm sorry I've been neglecting you.
Let me tell you what I did today.
KDU College had it's Hospitality Race - which is kinda like an Amazing Race-esque thing, and let me tell you that my experience then pretty much mimics that. First, there was the fact that we were having major transportation issues. Not only would the school not send us there, but a) Rifdi's driver couldn't do it because his dad had an important meeting at 8:30 and b) my driver couldn't do it because that would involve...me telling my parents I was at a competition. Heh. At least Hsing Shan's dad could send us.
I'm only going to go into the highlights. I elbowed a guy out of the way, Rifdi broke the egg that we were supposed to use for some task - and fell down the stairs multiple times. I nearly fainted, shrieked at both my teammates - oh, I kicked my boyfriend in the balls after he poured a bottle of water on me. We ran up and down the same flight of stairs so many times. D: By the end of it, (after we were eliminated) Hsing Shan couldn't walk, I couldn't sit and Rifdi was worried he couldn't reproduce. Oops.
Called the driver, went back to Hsing Shan's place. Heh. After a hot shower, I guess we all felt more human. Lots of apologising and camaderie since the race seemed to bring out the worst in us. Played Worms for a bit, until Hsing got up to order pizza.
And now I'm at tuition. Woo.
Let me tell you what I did today.
KDU College had it's Hospitality Race - which is kinda like an Amazing Race-esque thing, and let me tell you that my experience then pretty much mimics that. First, there was the fact that we were having major transportation issues. Not only would the school not send us there, but a) Rifdi's driver couldn't do it because his dad had an important meeting at 8:30 and b) my driver couldn't do it because that would involve...me telling my parents I was at a competition. Heh. At least Hsing Shan's dad could send us.
I'm only going to go into the highlights. I elbowed a guy out of the way, Rifdi broke the egg that we were supposed to use for some task - and fell down the stairs multiple times. I nearly fainted, shrieked at both my teammates - oh, I kicked my boyfriend in the balls after he poured a bottle of water on me. We ran up and down the same flight of stairs so many times. D: By the end of it, (after we were eliminated) Hsing Shan couldn't walk, I couldn't sit and Rifdi was worried he couldn't reproduce. Oops.
Called the driver, went back to Hsing Shan's place. Heh. After a hot shower, I guess we all felt more human. Lots of apologising and camaderie since the race seemed to bring out the worst in us. Played Worms for a bit, until Hsing got up to order pizza.
And now I'm at tuition. Woo.
Current Mood: cheerful
cheerfulCurrent Music: Take Me On The Floor - The Veronicas
25 March 2009 @ 06:07 pm
Kinda down. But then again, I rarely blog when I'm normal. I itch to blog when I'm emo and barely think about it when I'm happy. So the blogs end up messes of...emotion. And not particularly positive emotion.
-sigh-. Another trip to the office tomorrow. Out of all the places in school where I spend my time, I despise going to the office for the sheer reason that it usually means I'm in trouble. And yeah, I'm in trouble again.
I don't want to talk about it.
-sigh-. Another trip to the office tomorrow. Out of all the places in school where I spend my time, I despise going to the office for the sheer reason that it usually means I'm in trouble. And yeah, I'm in trouble again.
I don't want to talk about it.
Current Mood: 
depressed
depressedCurrent Music: Why - Secondhand Serenade | Sorry Sorry - Super Junior
16 March 2009 @ 02:22 am
I now know why I don't really stay up so late anymore. At least, not when I have access to a computer. I go a little loopy.
It's kinda fun, I guess. Being here at my grandparent's place instead of at home. At least there's noise. Background TV noise, people yelling at the football match noise and countless reality shows on BBCE. Yeah, it's a lot more noise than I'm actually used to (duh, Hannah. You're in a house where there are six people in residence. T_T) but I'm cool. I have the internets. 8D
Eurgh. Gotta go buy credit today. I'll make an effort to go to the shops later. Drag the maid with me since I can't go walking around DU by myself (snatch-thief area galore, apparently). I have - [insert tapping *122# on keypad] RM5.34. Oh god, fail.
Okay, once prom season rolls around (November-Decemberish), is anyone willing to help me look for a prom dress? Or at least a re-usable evening dress.
It's kinda fun, I guess. Being here at my grandparent's place instead of at home. At least there's noise. Background TV noise, people yelling at the football match noise and countless reality shows on BBCE. Yeah, it's a lot more noise than I'm actually used to (duh, Hannah. You're in a house where there are six people in residence. T_T) but I'm cool. I have the internets. 8D
Eurgh. Gotta go buy credit today. I'll make an effort to go to the shops later. Drag the maid with me since I can't go walking around DU by myself (snatch-thief area galore, apparently). I have - [insert tapping *122# on keypad] RM5.34. Oh god, fail.
Okay, once prom season rolls around (November-Decemberish), is anyone willing to help me look for a prom dress? Or at least a re-usable evening dress.
Current Music: Run, Don't Walk - Hey Monday
06 March 2009 @ 03:32 pm
Ahaha, Chang. You think I have a gaggle of boys trailing after me everywhere I go? That I've got some kind of personal entourage?
Wrong, wrong, wrong.
I spent most of today alone. ALONE. By myself. Or, as by myself as you can get while doing the never-ending piles of work in the PRS room. God, after four days in there I might just get sick of seeing the inside of it. Unless you count the amazing-ness of the air-conditioned office. :D
I hate green folders.
I finally showed up to library today - I guess someone realised that when I'm on racks, I tend to walk around and chat to everyone else - or worse, sit down and chat to people instead of cleaning like I'm supposed to. I'm on counter duty with Melor. I like Melor, she's nice.
Write later, emo now. Rifdi's off to Adam Khoo camp for the weekend. D:
Wrong, wrong, wrong.
I spent most of today alone. ALONE. By myself. Or, as by myself as you can get while doing the never-ending piles of work in the PRS room. God, after four days in there I might just get sick of seeing the inside of it. Unless you count the amazing-ness of the air-conditioned office. :D
I hate green folders.
I finally showed up to library today - I guess someone realised that when I'm on racks, I tend to walk around and chat to everyone else - or worse, sit down and chat to people instead of cleaning like I'm supposed to. I'm on counter duty with Melor. I like Melor, she's nice.
Write later, emo now. Rifdi's off to Adam Khoo camp for the weekend. D:
Current Mood: aggravated
aggravated05 March 2009 @ 05:53 pm
I'm at tuition!
God. I love the fact that Perfection has computers + internet. :D It makes me very happy, and no - I'm not this jazzed up because I had both a Starbucks frappucino AND cola within ten minutes of one another. Ooh, the world is so dizzying now. PRETTY!
Yeah, English was fun. All female class today. OH YEAH, and I haven't been in class (school) for four days because I've been doing PRS work. I'm not even a PRS (yet?) but I'm already doing work. Goddammit, I'm so sick of staring at Rifdi's name. Pick up 5 Jupiter's name list and there it is. Look for Pn. Hafizah's file and there's his name AGAIN. Oh, and look for the student files that she's assigned to and OHMYGOD, there his name is yet again. KHAIRIL RIFDI B. KHAIRIL FARIS. Rifdi, if you're reading this - I love you, and I love your name BUT I'm so damn sick of seeing your name and not you. I would like you, not black-and-white text. Thank you.
Oh yeah, all the male-halves of the known form four couples in school seem to have been dragged into the counsellor's office to 'talk'. So there've been all the major couples - when I say major, I mean the ones who have been a somewhat permanant fixture in the social hierarchy of the form. Much unlike the on-and-off debauchery (well, not really. but you get what I mean) that could possibly coin my and Rifdi's relationship.
Huggles.
Oh yes, that is a random word. Certainly a random word for such a random mood.
I love you baby, and it's quite alright. I need you baby, on such a lonely night. I love you baby, trust in me when I sa-ay. ~
I'll type when I'm not high.
Current Music: Scandalous - Mis-teeq
04 March 2009 @ 07:24 pm
everything, everything is just coming at the same time and i'm so so so sick of it and i just want it to stop. goddammit, everyone i'm sorry. i'm sorry viv and zoe for being an awful friend. i'm sorry rifdi for being an overdramatic girlfriend. i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry everyone. i'm sorry to my mum for pushing you to the point where you nearly committed suicide. i'm sorry.
i'll just stop talking.
Current Music: My Heart, Your Hands - From First To Last
04 March 2009 @ 07:06 pm
1.
I'll start with a retarded meme thing.
My best friends hate me.
And it's all my fault.
Fuck it.
Current Mood: morose
moroseCurrent Music: I Caught Fire - The Used
18 February 2009 @ 06:30 pm
Current Mood: good
goodCurrent Music: Gee - Girls' Generation
13 February 2009 @ 01:40 pm
Of all the songs that Charz has gotten me addicted to, I don't know why this one's stuck.
All Hail The Heartbreaker - The Spill Canvas
( full lyrics here )
Yeah.
So anyway, merentas desa tomorrow. 4.2km. Oh yeah, it's gonna be so fun. You can hear the fucking sarcasm dripping off my tongue. As much as the idea of running (and being in Category A this year) sounds fun, I don't appreciate the fact that they're making us go back to class after that. I'm gonna die.
And today, I'm moderating the YA Book Club at Borders. I also recieved flowers for Valentine's Day. :D Other than that, nothing really. (Mum went on an anti-Rifdi tirade last night. It was...enlightening)
Oh yeah, Rifdi quote of the day:
"See, Hannah? I told you that once you were single, the secret admirers would start rushing in,"
Ouch.
All Hail The Heartbreaker - The Spill Canvas
( full lyrics here )
Yeah.
So anyway, merentas desa tomorrow. 4.2km. Oh yeah, it's gonna be so fun. You can hear the fucking sarcasm dripping off my tongue. As much as the idea of running (and being in Category A this year) sounds fun, I don't appreciate the fact that they're making us go back to class after that. I'm gonna die.
And today, I'm moderating the YA Book Club at Borders. I also recieved flowers for Valentine's Day. :D Other than that, nothing really. (Mum went on an anti-Rifdi tirade last night. It was...enlightening)
Oh yeah, Rifdi quote of the day:
"See, Hannah? I told you that once you were single, the secret admirers would start rushing in,"
Ouch.
Current Mood: 
bitter
bitterCurrent Music: Eat You Up - BoA